A Buffer

We went out with Janardan's family today, to a museum. And I was worried about the experience, and not sure I was ready for it. I woke up this morning, less than a half hour before we needed to go, after not waking up to my alarm...and then realizing I had never turned it on. I went into TSC, and made a crazy mason mafia game - it's just a joke game, because I knew I didn't have time for a real game. It was the most hilarious game I have played it. genus made it so funny. Like the masons all know who the other masons are, because you meet each other at night. But then he led us to lynch one of the masons, and so we were calling him scum and stuff, just because it was a joke game (scum is a word we use for mafia). And like this guy was like, "Come on guys, you know I'm a mason. We were in a meeting." And we're like, "That is just what the mafia would say!" And it made me laugh so much. 

But it was better than just that too, because it brought a smile to my face, when I was stressing out in the car. The same way it brought peace to me to remember that MK had said he would pray for me. It was like they were this buffer to the world, and they were evidence that I am sane, and that I am cared about, that Janardan is not the only person in the world who cares about me. And so even though I freaked out later, things went ok, and I felt buffered from the world, and the things they said, while they still touched me, felt so much lighter, because the impact had been lessened by my buffers. 

And that makes me appreciate Janardan all the much more, because he is my constant and eternal buffer, and I cannot imagine how much worse this whole experience would have been, living here, had he not been by my side every step of the way. It sometimes takes other people doing the same thing your spouse is doing to appreciate that they are doing something so wonderful. I love Janardan. He is an amazing man.